


j'aurais toujours faim de toi

by cheinsaw



Category: Fate/Grand Order
Genre: Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Happy Sex, Porn with Feelings, real shinsengumi hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 12:19:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19425853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheinsaw/pseuds/cheinsaw
Summary: ("I will always be hungry for you.")Set after the third Gudaguda event (no spoilers). Okita Alter's presence in Chaldea is making Okita just a bit anxious. Nobunaga always knows how to calm her down.





	j'aurais toujours faim de toi

**Author's Note:**

> _Mais non pouvons faire ce que nous voulons_   
>  _J'aurais toujours faim de toi_
> 
> are you a real shinsengumi captain if you don't fuck in the haori?

Truth be told, Okita has no idea what happened. Ritsuka has been letting her rest lately, smaller missions notwithstanding. As much as she'd like to help out with a real Singularity, or even a pseudo-Singularity, Okita can't deny that having this much unburdened free time is, contrary to her expectations, somewhat pleasant. It doesn't remind her of her death the way it used to; she's content to simply enjoy day-to-day life as she never could before.

"You two were in this one!" Ritsuka told her and Nobunaga once she'd returned from the Rayshift. Then Nobunaga had tried to explain that the Okita and Nobu here in Chaldea were completely different iterations of their Spirit Origins than the ones in the Singularity, but Okita zoned out for most of it.

It's over now, which is the important thing. Ritsuka returned safely, and brought Sakamoto and his dragon with her, and it is over, and Okita remains.

Her Alter is there too. That's a new development. It seems Ritsuka has taken somewhat of a liking to her—that's fine. As long as Okita is allowed to stay in Chaldea, she has no problem with it.

…Well, maybe she has one problem.

Nobunaga. As much as she hates to admit it, Nobunaga's been looking at her Alter in the most obvious way. And why wouldn't she? The Alter is taller, prettier, curvier. Her skin isn't sickly pale, and she never coughs up blood or collapses in battle. Okita can't help but take it personally, slipping into insecurity.

(What if Nobunaga wants to—

Would Nobunaga rather—

have her instead?)

No. No, she wouldn't. Okita really and truly wants to believe she wouldn't. They might have been enemies in the past, but they've fought side by side for so long now, taken blows for each other, licked each other's wounds. And, even though the romantic aspect of their relationship is new in comparison, she'd like to think Nobunaga is just as devoted to her.

Nobu _loves_ her, she keeps telling herself. But when the two of them are in the kitchen, and Okita notices Nobunaga's eyes once again drawn to the Alter, it feels like it's carving a hole through her chest.

"Something's up with you," Nobunaga says once the Alter's left the room, red scarf flowing behind her like a flag in the wind.

"I'm fine," Okita says reflexively. And she is. She is fine.

Nobunaga only squints at her, calculating red eyes staring straight through her.

"It's… I'll talk to you once we're alone," Okita sighs, acquiescing after a moment of scrutiny.

"You wanna go back now?" Nobunaga motions behind her, in the general direction of the room they share.

"I'd like to eat first."

Nobunaga shrugs and turns her attention to her own food. The two of them eat, not talking, as anxiety twists in Okita's guts. She can't even remember the last time they shared a meal in silence.

The second they're back in their room and the door is closed behind them, Nobunaga starts talking again. "So, you wanna talk about it now? I mean, I have a pretty good idea of what it is."

"You could at least let me sit down."

Nobunaga scoffs, but dutifully waits until Okita's seated at their little tea table, then takes the spot next to her. "Yeah, so what's up? You've been really on edge the past few days. It's her, right?"

Neither of them need to clarify who Nobunaga means. "Yeah," Okita says. "But it's okay! I mean, it's not like—I don't hate her or anything. It's just…"

"Just what?"

Okita's mouth goes dry. "I just... I've noticed you looking at her."

"That's all?" Nobunaga wrinkles her nose.

"What do you mean, that's all!"

"I dunno, but… _Oh._ Oh, no, it's not like that! Believe me, I didn't even think of that until now. I guess I have been staring at her, but it's like... It's weird how much she looks like you. But she isn't. That's all."

"…She _is_ me, just—"

"Nope! That's not you." Nobunaga pauses. "Well, it is, but it's not _you."_

"I just can't stop thinking about it," Okita mumbles. "She's not sick like me..."

"Hey. Hey. Souji," Nobunaga says, cupping Okita's face in her hands. "Look at me. I don't care about her. Okay? I only want you. I don't care if you're sick or anything. She's never gonna replace you." Nobunaga cracks a smile. "Hey, don't cry."

"I'm not crying! Aah..." Okita's protests quickly trail off as Nobunaga leans in to kiss the tears away from the corners of her eyes. "Nobu, hey—don't jam your nose into my eye!"

"It's not like I'm trying to!"

"Nobu," Okita sighs. Then, again, just because she wants to say it, "Nobu."

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

Nobunaga beams. "I know! I love you too, Souji."

Okita feels as if she might melt, waves of relief washing over her heart. How could she have ever doubted Nobunaga, the very same Nobunaga who's never left her side, who's always shared her bed? 

"You want me to show you?"

Okita blinks. "Show me what?"

"That I'm a hundred percent dedicated to Souji!" Nobunaga hasn't stopped smiling. "I want to have sex with you. If you're feeling up to it?"

"Oh! Umm… Yeah," Okita says, feeling her face heat up. Perhaps that reassurance is what she needs—the feeling of Nobunaga all over her, murmuring her given name. Nobunaga may be blunt, but she's genuine.

Nobunaga leans in and presses a long, slow kiss to Okita's lips. In turn, Okita snakes her arms around Nobunaga's waist, drawing her closer. They push against each other, and yet it still feels too far apart—Nobunaga loosens Okita's scarf to kiss her neck, Okita accidentally tips Nobunaga's gaudy hat off her head. When Okita finds herself practically lying on the floor, Nobunaga on top of her, she can't do anything but smile.

"I got you, Souji," Nobunaga murmurs, and with some difficulty she scoops Okita's body up into her arms. Before Okita even thinks about it, she's being haphazardly carried over to their bed. Nobunaga groans, heaves, staggers, and tosses a giggling Okita onto the futon with a dull thud.

"Nobu!" Okita shrieks, practically screaming with laughter.

"You're heavier than I thought," Nobunaga says, panting.

"You carry all those matchlocks and you can't pick _me_ up?"

"I picked you up! It was carrying you that was the problem, okay? You try it!" Nobunaga has laid down with her, face to face. The way she's looking at Okita isn't anything like how she'd looked at the Alter. Okita sees it now. There's so much tenderness and love in her eyes that Okita feels like her heart could melt.

"Just keep kissing me," she says instead, unable to stop smiling.

"I can do that!"

Nobunaga kisses her face, her neck, her collarbone. She pulls Okita's haori away from her shoulder to press kisses there, then sucks a small lovebite against the dip where Okita's neck and collarbone meet. In the back of her mind somewhere, Okita dimly registers that it's a really good thing she wears a scarf every day, because Nobunaga is definitely leaving marks all over her.

At some point Nobunaga's untied her obi and pressed her hand softly against Okita's bare stomach beneath. Then, Nobunaga's fingers trail up, up, tracing her ribs and the swell of her breasts. Okita can feel herself prickling in anticipation, goosebumps raising on her arms despite the warmth in the room.

"Good?"

"Yes."

"Right." Nobunaga presses a quick kiss to Okita's lips, then parts the layers of fabric and lets them fall at Okita's sides, leaving her fully exposed. In seconds she's grabbing at Okita's chest, cupping her breasts and thumbing her nipples. She moves wildly, erratically, trailing her mouth along Okita's exposed skin until she can take a nipple into her mouth. The sensation shoots straight between Okita's legs, and she has to squeeze her thighs together.

Nobunaga trails her mouth further down, laying kisses all across Okita's belly. Okita could cry. She almost does. She's dizzy, drunk with love and pleasure and anticipation, a nice warm aching feeling. She lifts her hips, and Nobunaga takes the cue immediately to tug her underwear off. Her stockings come next, Nobunaga's small fingers expertly rolling them down and off her legs before Okita can react. Then—the sharp jolt of Nobunaga's teeth on the inside of her thigh.

"Nobu! That's—that's gonna show," Okita cries.

Nobunaga takes her lips away from Okita's skin for the first time in several minutes. "No, it won't."

"It will."

"Come on, Souji, you think I don't know the exact line where your stockings end by heart?" Nobunaga grins, all Demon King, up at her. "It's gonna be fine."

Okita isn't too sure about that, but what's done is done, and all that matters is the sweet heady pleasure that sends sparks through her body wherever Nobunaga touches. Nobunaga laughs, trailing a finger down Okita's calf to her ankle—just to see her squirm, Okita's sure.

"Nobu, please..."

"Please, huh?"

Okita's face burns in embarrassment. "This was your idea, you know!"

"I know." Nobunaga smiles up at her. "I just want to take my time showing my Souji how I love her."

"Nobu…"

"Alright, alright."

The second Nobunaga's mouth lands between her legs, Okita lets out a choked sob that quickly becomes a moan. Nobunaga's tongue zigzags up quickly, running a circle around Okita's clit. _Finally._

Okita gently brings her hands down to rest on Nobunaga's head, threading her fingers into Nobunaga's long hair. Nobunaga laps at her slit, nose bumping against Okita's clit with each movement. Then Nobunaga moves back up, taking Okita's clit in her mouth and licking at her with quick, precise strokes. It's all happening so fast, and so much, that Okita can already feel herself peaking, getting closer and closer, like a wave about to crash and, and, and,

Nobunaga stops.

"Nobu!"

"Hmm?" Nobunaga pulls away, replacing her mouth with her pointer finger, light as a feather. Okita can barely feel it, compared to the rough, hot swirls of Nobunaga's tongue from just seconds before.

"Aah, Nobu—I need—get me off, Nobu, _please—"_

"I'm getting you off," Nobunaga replies, still tracing a maddeningly light circle around Okita's clit. It's not enough, by far. "Just relax... Trust me! Have I ever let you down?"

"Several times," Okita gasps.

Nobunaga chooses to ignore the comment, just as Okita knew she would. "You gotta be patient, Souji! This is gonna be really good. Okay?" She slips a finger inside Okita, moving her other hand to rest her thumb just next to Okita's clit. "How's that feel?"

"Not enough," Okita cries. "I, I want—"

"Yeah?"

"Nobu, don't tease me, you know…" It feels so good, her body tense and hot and suspended in pleasure, and Nobunaga's looking at her so lovingly, but Okita is desperate and it's not _enough._

Nobunaga gives a few shallow thrusts, angling her finger in a little upward motion. "I promise I'm gonna make you come really hard. That's what I'm doing."

"Faster, please," Okita begs.

"Of course!"

Nobunaga dips her head back down, angling her mouth against the hood of Okita's clit and working her tongue in pointed circles. It doesn't take long for Nobunaga to bring her back up to the edge like this. Okita's trembling uncontrollably, legs shaking, fingers curling into the blankets. All she needs is—is—

Nobunaga hums, a low throaty almost-laugh, and Okita can't help herself. Her back arches high, her toes splay. Surely the loud cry of pleasure filing her ears must be her own voice, but Okita has no control over it. Her orgasm seems to last forever, suspending Okita writhing in agonizing bliss under Nobunaga's tongue and fingers. Nobunaga keeps going, with a smile, until Okita's completely spent and shuddering with aftershocks.

"See? Told ya!" she says when she finally pulls away. "It was good, right?"

Okita can barely speak. "Ahh... Yeah..."

"Good! Okay, one more!"

"Oh—" There's no time for Okita to even think before Nobunaga's tongue is back on her. She lets out a choked little cry as Nobunaga licks her up, taking all the come in her mouth. She's oversensitive, swollen, hot; she can't feel her legs. But there is Nobunaga between them, and Nobunaga is who she loves and trusts more than anything, anything, anything.

She comes easy this time, grabbing weakly at Nobunaga's hair. "No more," she whimpers when Nobunaga comes up for air. "I can't…"

"I know," Nobunaga says, and it's all love and adoration. She wipes her mouth on her sleeve, then gently kisses the bite she'd made earlier on Okita's thigh. "How's that?"

"I'm okay." She takes a second to assess herself past the ringing in her ears and the shaking in her legs. "I'm actually—yeah, better than okay." 

"I have something to show you, then!" Without waiting for a response, Nobunaga stands up and undoes her belt, letting her pants drop to the floor. She's slick and glistening, all over her inner thighs. "Look how wet you got me! I just really can't help myself when you make noises like that."

Seeing Nobunaga so aroused, for her, lights a fire in Okita all over again. "Oh," she says softly, her head still swimming.

"Do you want to do it? Or I could touch myself. You can watch, I don't mind."

" _Nobu!_ No, I want to."

"Okay, great!" Nobunaga tosses her shirt to the floor and steps out of her pants, then lies down on the futon so she and Okita's faces nearly touch. "Just do whatever you want to me!" Nobunaga flashes that signature grin of hers that never fails to dazzle Okita.

"Come here, then," Okita murmurs. "Here—" and her hand slots between Nobunaga's thighs. Two fingers slide in with no resistance. Okita wiggles them tentatively, but Nobunaga just sighs and lifts one leg to give Okita a better angle.

"Aah, that's… put in another one," she says. Okita does. "Yeah, that's it." Nobunaga's eyes close in delight, and she slings an arm over Okita's waist.

Okita's favorite part of doing this is, without fail, Nobunaga's face. Nobunaga is expressive; pleasure and lust and love all show easily on her. A little gasp, the twitch of her nose or mouth or eyebrow, her cheeks going pink, the wildness in her eyes. Okita wants it all. She can't deny it—she wants to watch Nobunaga come for her, fiery and alive and glowing, just like this.

"Ah, Souji…"

"Nobu," Okita murmurs back, then buries her head against Nobunaga's neck. She plants several kisses there, delighting in the quivering keening in Nobunaga's throat. "Nobu."

"Yeah, that's me."

"Idiot."

"You love me." Nobunaga's eyes flutter open for a second, her gaze fixing directly on Okita. She smiles, closes her eyes again, puckers her lips. Okita is all too happy to take the invitation.

"I do," Okita says when they part.

"Yeah?" Nobunaga's legs are shaking now, her tone breathless. There are little tears forming in the corners of her eyes that Okita would never have noticed if she weren't nose-to-nose with Nobunaga. "Oh, _shit,_ Souji, I'm gonna—"

So Okita curls her fingers harder, faster, harder, faster, until Nobunaga sings for her.

Nobunaga, coming back down, looks breathless and tired and so very beautiful. Okita's heart thrums, swells with love and affection. Nobunaga is hers; it's times like this that Okita treasures the most. When Nobunaga opens her eyes again, she looks only at Okita.

After another slow, languid kiss, Nobunaga presses her face into the hollow of Okita's neck, no doubt admiring the marks she's left there. "Are you still worried?" she says, her breath tickling Okita's bare skin.

"No. Not at all." It's the truth, and it brings a little smile to Okita's lips.

"I really would do anything for you," Nobunaga says, so quiet Okita barely hears.

"…Me too. I'm… I love you," Okita says again. She doesn't need to, she knows, but she'll say it a hundred times. "Nobu, I love you."

"Mmhm," Nobunaga hums sleepily. "I love you, Souji."

Nobunaga's asleep in a matter of minutes, as she always is. Okita smiles warmly at her, then presses a light kiss to Nobunaga's forehead before getting to her feet. She switches off the fluorescent light in their room, finding her way back to the futon in the dark by rote memory. Okita shucks off her haori, then her kimono. When she curls up in bed with Nobunaga, it's all skin on skin. Safety, warmth, loving security. And Okita Souji falls asleep with a smile on her face.


End file.
